Potential Life

This is just a random video that I strongly recommend you guys to see =]
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"This post will just be out of no where in my mind so I don't know how to re-describe this to you yet...sooooo...I'll just type along and save/post =D."
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Every once in awhile at school or at home, I wonder, "What is my path in life? What is my potential? What kind of job am I supposed to be taking classes for?..." When I was younger, my parents encouraged me to work hard to be a doctor when I grow up and when I was asked, "What do you want to be when you grow up?." I simplied answered, "I want to be a doctor" without even thinking about whether I really wanted to be a doctor.

By my middle school year, preferably in 8th grade, I considered that I did not want to be a doctor. Why do I want to be a doctor if that isn't truly what I wanted to be? I loved to write, but during my elementary and middle school years, I was never a successful writer, althought I kept imagining things I would probably write, but would never finish. I tried writing a book, but could never think of a full story plot first. I loved drawing and was great at sketching and cartooning, but I was limited and I yearned to learn more. I discovered my comics-making skill in 7th grade when my life science teacher, Mr. Brunner showed off my incredible comic (we were supposed to make a comic strip of the beginning of a star) to all his 7th grade life science classes. After lots of incredble, creatively designed notebooks and comic "strips," Mr. Brunner knew I had potential and said, "We could go in the business and sell your comics." I always thought he was kidding, but he knew I had potentiional in my art skills with comics. But...what was I going to be when I grow up?

In the very later 8th grade, I discovered a love and talent for making slideshows and videos, posting them on Youtube. They were simply MapleStory (RPG game) videos, but I had tons of ideas and imagination to put more together. I plan to learn how to use the video-camera and I'm inspired to make movies just like Phillip Wang's "Yellow Fever" and "A Moment with You," and "A Vision of Students Today" above. I told myself a goal that before I was a freshman college student (or was it I graduated high school?), I would direct and make a successful full-length movie and post it on my Youtube profile, and spread it around. Whenever I watch MapleStory videos, I think...I can do better...How is this so popular? I can do so much better because I know I can. Real video-camera...ing? Haha, we'll I'm still in the process of learning a little bit more about it (techniques and all that stuff), but I plan to master it probably by sophomore year. I'll take a class (I don't know what it's called, but a class that teachers stuff about video-making, video camera use? I'm not sure.)

My dad tells me that stuff like music (marching band, piano), drawing, writing, and video-making are only my hobbies and are not as important as my economics. He suggested that since I didn't want to be a doctor, I should be an architect. He tells me they design the houses and make lots of money, like my uncle. But...I like drawing and such, cartooning, sketching, etc etc., but I don't want to draw houses, especially for other people. I don't know. Maybe I'll help me if I learn how to draw houses. But it's not like I'm just drawing the house as a masterpieces. I'm drawing a blueprint, of every wall, flooring, exterior, roofs. It's like a blueprint of a human body, part by part. Or maybe as I should see it...a blueprint of how my life is gonna be constructed and build. Maybe I could take a part-time job as a music-instructor. Or...I could become a famous director; though, it does seem a bit extreme the way you think about (Hollywood, Oscar's, Broadway, etc.).

Should I really take this class? Is it really worth taking the class? How much time will I have to actually be able to deal with the work given?

My dad told me the strangest thing yesterday:

We were driving to Westminster High School for a marching band night rehearsal, when he was telling me for the millionth time in a row about his stress with the band commitment. But this time he was telling me how the Bahamas trip next year will put him even more in debt and how the emails and all this stuff ask him to volunteer, etc. He asks to me, "If I volunteer, how will I work for the money for your band fee? They expect that everyone is a rich family and has one or two free parents who don't work. That's why those moms are the chaperones. You have two working parents. I'm not even supposed to be leaving your brother home alone; it's illegal, but he has to do his homework..." And it goes on and on. But that's not the point.

[Rephrased]
"In your freshman and sophomore year, you have to take as many honors classes as you can. In your junior and senior, take as many AP classes. [We as asians] have to work two times as much as a white person. If you apply for a job and the choice was between you and a white person, the white person would be picked over you. If you weren't smarter than the white person, the white person was picked. If both of you were even, the white person would still be picked. That's why you have to be smarter than the white person. Then you will have a good life." My dad continued on. I never really thought about my dad saying that, but I thought racism wasn't allowed in occupations or something. I don't know.

Even so...it hurts me brain whenever I try to think, "What am I going to be when I grow up." It's already 25% into my freshman year and marching season seems to pass by so fast and its almost over. Less than four more years for college, but what will I major in? My dad says you have to choose by sophomore year what you want to be. I think I'll take an eternity. But I'll find it when it comes to me. In the meantime, I'll stick with my major interests and goals: music, art, writing, and videos.